Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
