like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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