white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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