just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
