chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
