i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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