Do vagina's smell?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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