I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
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