I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Come on in and take your pants off
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize