i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
