Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize