fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize