Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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