brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
