why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
