Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Randomize
