If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
i drank out of a bidet.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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