You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize