perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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