My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
