People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
