Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think people are normalizing furries
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize