You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
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