question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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