I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
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I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
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Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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