i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
