I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
