I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
