Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I had to cum in my sink.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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