I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
