Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize