4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
