I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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