You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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