i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
