**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
