sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
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