Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(901): View more from Tennessee

i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing

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(901): View more from Tennessee

I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.

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19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(253): View more from Washington

The pine trees are waving at me.

(907): View more from Alaska

Put the pipe down honey.

(253): View more from Washington

Hi trees.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.

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(802): View more from Vermont

Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting

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(914): View more from New York

My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.

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