Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(269): View more from Michigan

We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.

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(513): View more from Ohio

just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.

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(815): View more from Illinois

It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.

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25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Read it at the TFLN blog
(910): View more from North Carolina

I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test

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(661): View more from California

Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.

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(916): View more from California

I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.

(831): View more from California

Promise??

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(613): View more from Ontario

Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?

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(551): View more from New Jersey

she's throwing knives it scares me

(551): View more from New Jersey

update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere

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