i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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