So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
