super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
