So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
