My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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