I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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