We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Ambien. No doubt about it.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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