Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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