you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Randomize
