yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
