it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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