Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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