You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
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Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
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I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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