I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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